The Belonging’s – A short love story
Dave was lying on his bed, staring blankly at the ceiling fan. It was 3 am, but sleep still eluded him as he was totally bored. Life in London was nothing like what he had envisaged.
Having nothing else to do, his thoughts went to the awards dinner that was to be held next week, next Friday more specifically. Dave looked forward to it. He was doing good as a writer and why not? Given his very active imagination and knack of putting it beautifully into words, his books were usually bestsellers shortly after hitting the market. This time round, Dave had been asked to bring a partner along. And, he wanted to take along a woman – beautiful, intelligent – someone he would be proud to have beside him. After all Dave Gomes had a reputation to keep!
With this his thoughts turned back to Sussex and to Penny. She was his best friend, someone who always made him feel special. She meant a lot to him and Dave loved her dearly and felt very lonely without her, just as he was feeling now. She was one of the very few he knew who really understood him.
Penny was beautiful with long blonde hair and the deepest blue eyes. However, Dave had failed to spare her the time and attention she really craved for a year back. And they had drifted away as his fame grew. Before he left for London, Penny had met someone else. The blow was too much for Dave but there was nothing he could have done then, his career was more important. However, a year down the line, given another chance he would gladly trade all he had just to be with her again.
“I can always call her, can’t I?” thought Dave. And he suddenly sat up, grabbed his diary and looked for her number. “I hope her mobile number is still the same.” Back in Sussex, he had called her often. But in London, he had been too busy to do so. Moreover, he didn’t want to disturb her.
Nervously, he dialed her number. The phone rang half a dozen times. He was about to put the receiver down, when he heard a voice, her voice.
“Hello?”
Dave paused unable to reply.
“Hello, who’s this?”
“Hi Penny, how’ve you been?”
“Dave, is it you?”
“Yes, sweets, it’s me”
“You idiot, where the hell were you all these days?”
“Am in London, Penny it feels wonderful to hear your voice again.”
“I still can’t believe it’s you, how are you Dave?”
“Fine, how are you and Fred?”
“Am okay, about him am not sure, we split up some months ago.”
Dave’s heart skipped a couple of beats.
“Penny, am so sorry to hear that,” he lied.
Then Dave and Penny talked and talked. After an hour Dave went back to bed. He could not sleep for his mind was filled with long-forgotten memories.
The next day, Penny was woken with the thud of a mail in her letterbox. She went and picked it up. Eagerly, she opened it and read the letter.
It was from Dave. “I miss you loads. I will be attending a writers’ award dinner next Friday at Hotel Fame in London. I would love it if you accompany me. I have enclosed a ticket for the flight on Thursday evening. Remember, I will be at the airport for you whether you decide to come or not. And, I don’t want you to do something that you don’t want to,” love Dave.
The week passed by very quickly. On Thursday morning, Dave bought a stunning black dress for Penny and laid it on the bed next to a huge bunch of flowers, red roses. “She will look lovely in this,” he said to himself. Dave hadn’t slept much the previous night. He glanced nervously at his watch. “Ten more hours before I see her,” he said to himself.
The remainder of the day dragged on and finally it was just an hour to Penny’s flight. Dave freshened up and left his apartment. He drove to the airport. The silver moon seemed to reflect his own pristine desire to be with her again. This time he wouldn’t let her go any where. Life couldn’t be better. He was being given a second chance at love!
Dave went and sat in the waiting area. The airport was busy. The flight was due in just 20 minutes in terminal twelve. Finally the announcement was made.
“Flight S222 from Sussex has arrived at terminal twelve,” was the announcement. That was Penny’s flight.
Dave ran to the exit passage. The ten minutes it took for all the passengers from Sussex to appear seemed like an eternity to Dave. Expectantly he watched, what seemed like hundreds of, people appear and his heart sank for he couldn’t spot Penny.
At a distance he saw a woman. She looked familiar. It was his Penny and he rushed to hug her. Penny too embraced him. “Penny you don’t know how much I needed to hold you again.” He took Penny, her cases and drove to a beautiful spot. Getting out of the car, as they stayed locked in an embrace, Dave looked at Penny’s pretty face lit up by the moon.
“I love you Penny,” Dave whispered. “I love you too,” pat came the reply. Dave had longed for those words for so long that a tear fell from his eye. He told her about the writers event. “I want to show you off to the world my beautiful girl.” And then he stroked her face and closed his eyes as their lips melted. She showered her gentle kisses all over his face and he drifted into another world, when he felt a tap on his shoulder.
“Sir, can you lift your feet please?”
Dave realised that he had fallen asleep in the lounge chair. The cleaning lady was standing over him. The terminal was empty. He looked at the clock. It was 1 am. His Penny had not turned up. His fertile imagination had got the better of him again. Slowly he left the airport.
Dave was heart broken. Back in his apartment, he sat dejectedly on the bed. “What a bloody fool I was to think she would come all this way to see me,” he thought.
He looked at the roses and the evening dress he had bought for her. His eyes were heavy. He wanted to sleep. He closed his eyes.
Some time later Dave’s sleep was disturbed by a loud knocking sound. He walked over to the drawing room. At the glass front door, he saw the silhouette of a woman carrying two cases.
His heart started beating many times faster as he made his way to the door. Guess what happened? As he opened the door, he saw Penny standing there. His Penny had come after all.
Smiling sheepishly, she said, “I missed the flight, so I drove down. I’m sorry. I hope you don’t mind.”
Dave just took her gently in his arms and held her close for the second time that night.
As they embraced, Penny softly whispered in his ear, “I couldn’t let you down Dave. I wanted this to happen such a long time back.”
Dave closed her mouth with a kiss that seemed to last for an eternity. “Please, please don’t be a dream for I would die if it was one.” Penny’s kisses reassured him that it was really her.
And as the two lovers moved into the apartment, they forgot all about the world as they became busy rediscovering themselves and their undying love for each other!
Nice story, good transition… but the end became bit predictable
…Penny could have surprised him with her presence at the Dinner.
@Rohit : For the ending, Rohit! ‘It’s like; “sometime you just need to give it away!”‘ That is termed by a name, ‘simplification’.
How can she possibly have aimed for any sort of surprise?! …because, she wasn’t even intending on any. So now you know why she didn’t end the story with a surprised presence at the dinner.
That was purely a reader’s point of view
. No doubts, I liked the story .
did not know why or how the author intended it to end….but the fact that Penny waited for such a long time for dave to get back to her is divine….in real life shoe could have been busy with someone else not paying any heed to what Dave might have felt or atleast intended to feel…..
such romances happen only in stories….or to greatest fools….!!!
good words..well written….good short story…
nice story..loved it!!
@ the dreamer – glad you enjoyed reading this story.
This is a great love story! I was wondering how it might end!
a nice twist to it, and some moral values for priority check points of what really matters in our life, w/ the essential touch of forgiveness. 
I call abuse of the possessive apostrophe. The title is grammatically incorrect.
Correct use (unless you meant it to be “Belonging IS- A Short Love Story”) “The Belongings”.
Are you talking about the “feeling of belonging” or belongings as in “I possess a lot of belongings”? Important difference.
First line has a passive verb “was lying”. Avoid passive verbs like was and had. Ex: He had been looking or she was wondering work better as active verbs: “He looked” “She wondered”.
I’ve read far too many story and books starting with characters lying in beds staring at the ceiling.
Not good: “Having nothing else to do,”
Main characters who have nothing else to do are not interesting reading.
“his thoughts went to the awards dinner that was to be held next week, next Friday more specifically.”
Better: “His thoughts turned to the awards ceremony that would be held next Friday.”
Sentence structure is awkward. Try reading your work aloud. If you stumble over it or need to breathe in to finish a sentence, it is too long and complicated. Simplify.
“He was doing good as a writer and why not?”
A writer with grammatically incorrect internal dialog. It should be: “He was doing well as a writer.”
Leave off the “and why not? question. Jarring and self-conscious.
“Given his very active imagination and knack of putting it beautifully into words, his books were usually bestsellers shortly after hitting the market.”
This is telling, not showing, a brief info dump.
Mark Twain on the word “very”: Substitute “damn” every time you’re inclined to write “very”; your editor will delete it and the writing will be just as it should be.”
Books are not “usually” bestsellers after hitting the “market.”
Books become bestsellers after hitting the bookstores. They become bestsellers after years of hard work, providing the publishers get behind the writers with massive promotion.
“This time round, Dave had been asked to bring a partner along.”
By whom? Publishers, agents, and award committees do not dictate to bestselling writers what they can and cannot do for social events.
“And, he wanted to take along a woman – beautiful, intelligent – someone he would be proud to have beside him.”
Don’t begin a sentence with a conjunction. Grammar fail.
He wants a beautiful woman beside him, so how does that make him different from 6 million other straight males? Points to the character for wanting her to be intelligent. Some guys don’t count that as a plus.
“After all, (insert comma) Dave Gomes had a reputation to keep!”
Avoid ending a narrative sentence with an exclamation point. It’s called comic book punctuation. If you can’t make the narrative exciting with words, then punctuation won’t help.
You make a declaration that he has a reputation to keep, but do not explain why in the next line. This assumes the reader is as familiar with the character as the writer. Trust that the reader does not know anything about the character.
That’s where I stopped reading. I work as an editor and this story is now being slipped into the return envelope. The writer needs to get Strunk and White’s Elements of Style and read every page.
The writer also needs to read a minimum of 300 other short stories and study how those writers mastered the form.
Go to the library’s anthology section and dive in. I suggest starting with Saki, Conan Doyle, Raymond Chandler, and O. Henry. Even if all you read are their first sentences you will learn from them.
Good luck
You know one should consider him/herself lucky to receive a comment like the one by JaneyD. Many writers would do a lot better if they received such critique and suggestions for improvement instead of “what a great story” – kind of comments. The story might be great but there is always a scope for improvement and it is great when there is someone to tell us where to start!
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